Attitude is everything.
Only two more weeks until nursing school starts. And I've had a quasi-serious case of the 'butterflies' in my stomach for the past few weeks.
It is a feeling of excitement mixed with a bit of fear of the unknown. I felt somewhat better when I realized that this was not a new feeling with the approach of nursing school. In fact, this was the same, exact feeling I've had every year I've had a school year starting, even going way back to elementary school. It is a feeling that dissipates very quickly once I actually set foot inside the classroom, because then I know what I am dealing with.
This morning, a'calm' feeling took over. I still have the 'butterflies', they'll be there until classes start, but I also have a serene, peaceful, enveloping feeling of calm.
I think this feeling comes from the fact that the major decisions, the months and months (years!) of thinking about making a change, of weighing the pro-cons of this decision, of convincing myself that it was OK to leave an established career, that it will all be OK and that I will be most grateful and much happier for having made this change -- basically all the emotions and thoughts that were put into making this huge career-change decision -- are coming to a close. For all intents and purposes, the decisions are over. They're made. They're done.
And that is a huge relief.
I feel calm, peace and gratitude that this new phase of my life is starting in a few short days.
The life-changing decisions are made, action has been taken to set the decisions into play, and now I get to crack open the books and start learning the medical stuff that I've wanted to learn ever since I can remember. I finally get to stop thinking about wanting to do and learn medical stuff, and actually doing and learning medical stuff.
And that is an amazing feeling. :-)
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